I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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