the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
