Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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