I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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