the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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