super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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