Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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