He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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