I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
