? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
