when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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