Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
