Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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