Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
