is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
