We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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