So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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