Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
