I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
