Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize