when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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