dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
