Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
