Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize