yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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