she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Holy shit dude........stairs
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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