I have demons in me.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
