why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
