im gay
i know
yea but for you.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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