Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry Gunslimger79 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Whats the glycemic index on semen?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one

(609): View more from New Jersey

ravioli

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(203): View more from Connecticut

he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen

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(859): View more from Kentucky

You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.

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(647): View more from Ontario

I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.

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(561): View more from Florida

This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem

(1-561): View more from Florida

Gotta pay my student loans some way

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(972): View more from Texas

How was it?

(940): View more from Texas

Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.

(972): View more from Texas

He should write a pamphlet or something...

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