i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
