Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
My vagina just recognized that song.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
