I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
my shit smells like andre
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Randomize
