we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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