We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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