I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
