last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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