I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize