For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
