So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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