Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
