That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize