garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
