Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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