shes about as inviting as chlamydia
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
