Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
