taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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