He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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