Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
