I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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